Single and frustrated?

Are you thinking to yourself:

“All my friends have found their person. All I have are stories. All I have are lessons learned. I have nothing to show for myself”

Well, I have news for you.

While you might not have found your person yet and you might feel like you’re falling behind, what you do have is something much more valuable. You have something incredible.

You have a resolve to never settle.

That resolve is more powerful than being able to select “in a relationship” on Facebook or talking about quarantining with your SO.

To know that you haven’t settled and have no intention of ever settling is something that so many people don’t have.

I don’t have any numbers to back this up but I’m willing to bet that there are a lot of people in relationships right now who behind closed doors while staring at the ceiling at night admit to themselves that they are settling. They are settling for someone who is not their person.

BUT their desire to not start over, to be comfortable and to not be perceived as falling behind trumps that realization. And so they just live in that settled world.

But you? You my beautiful friend! You say you have nothing to show?

You say all you have to show for yourself are…

- times you’ve been ghosted. times you’ve been left on read.

- times you shared your deepest feelings only to have them thrown in your face -

- times you finally thought you found the one only to realize how wrong that person truly was for you.

You say you only have stories but no love?

I say you have something more valuable than love right now.

You have something that so many “settlers” wish they had but are too afraid to reset to get.

You have a determination to not settle. You have the promise of hope. You have something you hold onto.

Most of all, you have a sense of pride knowing that even though you feel like you’ve been beat up and like you’ve run a marathon you still refuse to lay down and call it quits. You refuse to settle.

That is a big deal! It really is!

Because love will come. But your resolve and stubbornness to not settle is something you should be proud of and should offset any negative feelings you have that you’re falling behind.

You have the gift of self respect! You have the gift of self love. You have the gift of knowing what you deserve.

You have open eyes and an eager heart!

That is a powerful combination :)

That’s a gift not everyone ever gets because they either settled and never looked back or they never dove deep to understand themselves.

But you my friend have been through a lot and you’re not afraid to still wait a bit longer. You refuse to not be appreciated. You refuse to be a second option.

You refuse to settle. That is a promise you have made to yourself whether you realize it or not.

There are so many times where you could have have settled, but you didn’t because you would rather appear to be falling behind than to live a lifetime knowing you didn’t keep going.

You’ve opted for the tougher decision but it’s one that ultimately makes you whole and I’m proud of you for that.

So please don’t think you have nothing to show for yourself.

You have yourself to show.

And look at you! You’re glowing! You’re glowing with resolve and self respect and at the end of the day, THAT is what matters!

You have those stories and those lessons as proof that you refuse to settle.

You have yourself to show and that is something to be proud of.