· By Case Kenny
A bad day isn't a bad life
Anytime something negative happens in my life or I have an anxious or sad day... I tend to jump to a conclusion like "welp... this is my life now."
I tend to think a bad day will continue and become a bad life.
I tend to think an unanswered question, a doubt or an insecurity will follow me forever.
Can you relate to that?
It’s a very human thing to take negative input - a bad day or a negative feeling - and extrapolate it to the rest of our lives.
Mantras only go so far and our human wiring tends to overpower reminders of "this too shall pass" quickly.
So how do we overcome our human inclination to think a bad day means a bad life?
Look back to look forward.
Put yourself in the shoes of 5 year ago YOU.
Try to recall literally everything you can about 5 years ago you - who you were, what you were doing, how you dressed, etc.
Most of all… try to remember the specific challenges, frustrations and questions you faced at the time.
The questions you had...
What am I doing? I don’t know what I want to do. I’m falling behind everyone else. How do I find my place in life?
The way you identified yourself...
I don’t like the way I look. I only look good from my right side, I feel skinny, overweight, etc.
The things that made you anxious...
I’m not good enough. I have to prove something to my parents, my friends, etc. I need more money to be happy, etc.
Now flash forward back to today.
How many of those challenges, negative emotions, questions and insecurities remain in your life today in the same form?
I’m willing to bet that even if you’re still working on them in some sense... you largely answered them or you evolved to move on to new question and new challenges.
When you look back openly and honestly you'll realize that 5 years ago you had a lot of questions, assumptions and doubts - similar to the ones you’re feeling now.
BUT you found answers to them, you evolved past them and you found purpose in that struggle.
Look back and realize that the things that pulled at you 5 years DID NOT become your life.
Apply that same reminder to the things that pull at you and you're tempted to think "this is my life" today.
Time offers you an incredible gift.
It offers you the ability to overcome those challenges, answer those questions and embrace those insecurities… so that you can move on to the next ones. In time you always find a truer version of yourself that makes you realize those challenges, doubts and insecurities are no longer "you."
Time gives you the gift to grow and you either find the answers you're looking for or you level up so much so that those issues are no longer issues for you.
Remember the things you used to think were cool? (*cringe) Remember the tings you used to stress about? Are they still true in your life?
That is the gift of time when it comes to our doubts, insecurities and challenges.
Consider how many questions you've answered in 5 years. You found the answers you were looking for and you’ll find them again.
You found a truer version of yourself and you'll find that again.
Struggle, self doubt, insecurity and unanswered questions will always be part of life. To think you’re never going to find the answers… that’s not giving yourself the credit you deserve!
You’ll find what you’re looking for. You’ll answer the questions. You’ll embrace insecurities. You’ll level up to 2.0
You’ve done it before and you’ll continue to do it. You’re looking for the answers. You're motivated to not be stuck. You’re motivated to break patterns and cycles. Some people are not.
Some people say "this is my life now" and they accept it.
You might be tempted in moments of weakness just like me… but choose to look back to look forward and watch watch happens.
Look back at the younger version of you with younger, 1.0 questions, doubts and insecurities. Now look at how much you've learned, overcome and answered.
You turn pages. You close chapters. You start new ones.
That is what matters.