· By Case Kenny
This is how you get what you deserve
Knowing you deserve better starts with admitting you were wrong.
The greatest gift you can give yourself is admitting you've made wrong choices.
But let's back up because that sounds like taking the fast lane to self blame. I’m sure in some area of your life you agree that you deserve better, right?
We all say we deserve better and we know deep down that we do... BUT how do you actually receive what you deserve?
You step up and admit you were wrong.
That's how you move past what you DON'T deserve. That's how you move past a toxic ex. That’s how you move past friends who weren’t really friends. That’s how you move past a job that drained you. That’s how you move past an insecurity that's held you back for a long time.
You simply admit you were wrong.
The buck stops there. When you can admit you were wrong as a means of claiming what comes next... you stop self blame in its tracks. You stop beating yourself up. You stop doubting yourself. You stop thinking you’re doomed to repeat and repeat and repeat.
You simple admit you made a wrong choice. You're not saying YOU are wrong as a person or that your standards are too high. No. You simply admit that you made a wrong choice.
- I was wrong to have seen potential in that person.
- I was wrong to have allowed that person to walk all over me.
- I was wrong to have allowed my boss to demand so much of me.
- I was wrong to have thought my appearance was reflective of my worth.
- I was wrong to have given up on my passion so early.
With the simple act of saying you’re wrong you’re giving yourself permission to try again in a new way.
You’re not saying you’re at fault for trying. You’re not saying you’re dumb for not seeing the red flags, for trusting someone, etc.
You're simply saying you made a wrong choice and now you have a chance to get it right by making another choice.
Being wrong is NOT a bad thing. We give the word WRONG way too much weight in life. We think wrong means low value, low worth, etc.
But in my world, it’s quite the opposite.
Admitting you made a wrong choice means you’re now free to go in a different direction without hanging onto any blame.
That’s it. End of story.
Saying you’re wrong doesn’t have to be a heavy practice. It’s just saying a choice was wrong.
That's a choice - not your value, not who you are, not your standards or your expectations. Just a choice. That's a choice in a person, a job, a conclusion you made about yourself, etc. I was wrong. It’s the greatest gift you can give yourself. Saying this is how you stop a pattern.
It's how you stop accepting less. It's how you stop not living up to your standards.
You look that feeling in the face, you address it head on, you tear it down and you never go back. That’s what you’re doing when you say I was wrong.
Try it. Right now… think about something you’re still hung up on and say I was wrong. Not I am wrong or I am less.
Just a simple "I was wrong."
In doing so you’re setting the expectation that in the future you’re not afraid of getting it wrong again.
You’re not afraid because you know the power of claiming what you deserve by making new, better choices in the future - ones that truly live up to your standards AND live up to what you learned from the choices in your past.