· By Case Kenny
Be a hopeful romantic... not a hopeless romantic
In the most uplifting, compassionate and optimistic way possible… I want you to realize that there’s more to life than love. There’s more to life than defining yourself by your search for a relationship.
There's more to life than defining yourself by your status as a girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife, etc.
Yes, it serves a huuuuuge purpose... an enormously fulfilling human purpose... but THAT is to magnify who you are and the happiness you already have. It magnifies that. It doesn’t create it.
A HOPEFUL romantic understands that whereas a HOPELESS romantic is quick to forget.
Here's what I mean.
I believe in the idea of romance! I believe in feeling butterflies when you find somewhen special. I believe in wining and dining and your heart skipping a beat when that person texts or calls you. I believe in such a strong connection that it’s overwhelming. I want that for myself. I want that for you… BUT I don’t think it should be an obsession.
It shouldn't be a defining all consuming life mission.
Because when it does, you start chasing. You start becoming desperate, you start being someone you're not, you ignore your passions and growth… and most of all you miss out on the fact that there’s more to life than love.
You become a stranger to yourself.
But a hopeful romantic doesn't lose sight of this. They are defined by optimism.
- It’s someone who doesn’t get lost in only being a boyfriend or girlfriend or wife or husband or a single person. It’s someone who doesn’t blindly chase.
- It’s someone who doesn’t put their life goals, their life ambitions, their personal growth on permanent hold because they’re chasing... because they need that LOVE right now.
- It’s someone who doesn’t become a stranger to themself because they’re desperate for love.
A hopeful romantic is someone who invests in themselves, in who they are, in what they want, in what they’re capable of doing and who they’re capable of becoming… and THEN they fit love into that picture.
They do that because they realize what love with the right person is.
It’s a 10x, a 100x multiplier on everything you do and everything you are. It makes everything better. It makes who you are better. It makes what you do better. It makes your outlook on life better. It makes your everyday mundane experiences better. It makes your big life moments better.
THAT is the key difference between a hopeless romantic and a hopeful romantic. A hopeless romantic defines themselves and their life by that love or their search for it.
BUT a hopeful romantic sees it for what it is - it’s a multiplier for who they ALREADY are and the happiness they've ALREADY created and are still creating. Your life has to have meaning outside of love! It has to!
There is more to life than love. Romantic love.
There is love for yourself. Love for friends. Love for a passion. Love for a purpose. Love for a cause. Love for a creative outlet. You’re doing yourself a disservice if you turn your back on this and inadvertently become a stranger to yourself.
This is a message of hope! This is a message of optimism!
The right love complements your life mission - it’s not your life mission. It complements your life growth, your passions, your curiosity and your discovery of life. It doesn’t replace those things.
It multiplies the happiness and enjoyment you have in your life. It multiplies the happiness and enjoyment you’ll continue to find in life. It’s a complement to who you are and what you’re doing. It’s not THE thing that defines you. It multiples the things that define you.
Be a HOPEFUL romantic... not a HOPELESS romantic.
Have patience. Remain driven to accomplish what you want whether that’s in your career or a creative outlet or your self growth.
You don’t need to become a stranger to yourself in the search for love.
There's more to life than romantic love. There’s the love you have for yourself.
There's love you develop for yourself. There's the love you discover for the world around you. There's love you develop for creativity, passion, purpose, music, art, etc.
It’s SO important to develop that and chase that. It’s so important to not become a stranger to those things. Lean into those things! Don't stop chasing them.
Do that so that when you do find that person, your relationship with them will simply multiply it.
THAT is a what being hopeful romantic is all about.
Take the best aspects of being a hopeless romantic - a belief in love, connection, sacrifice, compassion and vulnerability - but recognize that those things are nothing if you’re a stranger to who you are.