· By Case Kenny
Never be ashamed of how you feel
No matter what feeling or emotion you have… you should never feel ashamed for having it.
You should never feel bad for loving someone when you shouldn't have. You should never feel guilty for believing in potential, for wanting to believe in goodness and compassion, for being a bit different, for wanting different, for not liking the mainstream, or for being a bit weird.
But never let those emotions lead you to thoughts like:
- I’m such an idiot for being nervous.
- I’m such an idiot for not having seen that red flag in that person.
- I’m such an idiot for thinking I could pull that project off and get a good grade.
- I’m such an idiot for thinking I was ready for that promotion.
- I’m such an idiot for thinking I was funny.
- I’m such an idiot for introducing myself to that person.
You have nothing to be ashamed of! Ever! I’ve learned that in life we’re destined to mess up all the time.
But if your intention are rooted in self love and compassion… no feeling you have should be something you are ashamed of.
Seriously!
- If you’re nervous because you really want to do well… how can you shame yourself for wanting to do well?
- If you’re beating yourself up for dating a f**boi because you really wanted to see potential in that guy… how can you shame yourself for believing in potential?
- If you’re disappointed that you bombed an interview… how can you shame yourself for wanting to push and elevate yourself?
- If you’re feeling embarrassed because your sense of humor or personality isn’t meshing with new friends… how can you shame yourself for wanting to connect with others?
You have nothing to be ashamed of.
Your emotions make you YOU and if those emotions guide you to do things - well intentioned, compassionate things that might make you stand out or ostracize you in some way - you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you love being single and you like sleeping around because you enjoy it and you do it safely and you respect yourself and others … you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you love being in a relationship all the time and you find yourself getting attached too quickly and wanting to see potential in too many people… you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you’re a dude and you like knitting and going to the spa… you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you’re a woman and you enjoy motocross and crushing tall boys on football Saturdays… you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you’re content with working your comfortable 9-5 and don’t want to grind it out for $1MM… you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you’re not content with a 9-5 and you want $1MM income… you have nothing to be ashamed of. If you’re more emotional or more prone to being a bit crazy than the average person… you have nothing to be ashamed of.
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If you’re less emotional and don’t get overly feely… you have nothing to be ashamed of. Your emotions are nothing to be ashamed of.
You have nothing to be ashamed of when you listen to yourself.
You have nothing to be ashamed of when you want to see goodness in someone else and unfortunately that comes back to bite you. You have nothing to be ashamed of when you act on your curiosity and you fail or fall or it’s awkward or humiliating.
You have nothing to be ashamed of because you are acting on what makes you human. Don't give up on those emotions. Don't give up on the energy that is true to you. It is YOU. It is human. And how can you feel guilty or ashamed for being human?
Explore that emotion, explore that feeling, explore that curiosity.
- Don’t cast it aside because you assume that you’re supposed to be ashamed of it.
- Don’t cast it aside because you’re an emotional dude and you’re supposed to be ashamed of that.
- Don’t cast it aside because you're not interested in settling down and you’d rather ho it up and that’s not PC.
- Don’t cast it aside because you’re not interested in mainstream hobbies and you’d rather spend your weekend doing a paint by number or learning how to do handstands LOL.
- Don’t cast it aside because you want to see goodness in others.
You want to see potential in others and that makes you assume you should feel ashamed for being naive or gullible. Those are well intentioned emotions and they make you human and that’s nothing to feel ashamed for.