· By Case Kenny
You're allowed to let people down
Controversial statement: if you’re not disappointing someone at some point in your life… you’re not living a life that is true to you.
It’s necessary because if you're honestly living your best, most true and compassionate life... you’re going to let some folks down.
Why? Because you're changing.
You're going to go from having a certain type of personality you date, a certain kind of friend group, a certain drive or appetite for a career - to something completely different.
And that's going to inevitably going to change some of your relationships. You’re going to find yourself moving away from certain people and towards others. You’re going to find yourself saying no when you used to say yes. You’re inevitably going to let other people down.
In fact... I think you SHOULD be letting people down at some point. Because if you’re not, I’m skeptical that you’re actually changing.
You need to change! I need to change. We need to change.
That is the key to becoming the person you want to become.
I’m sure you have countless examples that prove this in your life - literal changes where you dated a certain type and then someone completely different. You changed jobs. Changed in cities. Changed your preferences for leisure activities. Changed what you used to think was fun vs. what is fun for you now.
There’s no denying you needed those changes.
So, you’re living with a “I don't want to let anyone down," mentality, if you’re a perpetual people pleaser, if you want everyone to be happy and comfortable and pleased with you… you're literally preventing your future changes from happening. And they need to happen! You need to let some folks down. Doing that gives you change receipts - proof that you’re growing.
If you’re not letting people down occasionally in your life… I don’t see proof of the changes you’re making in your life.
You need to change and inherent in that is letting some people down.
That certainly isn't easy, so I personally find it helpful to realize that when I decide that someone isn’t meant to be part of my journey anymore… it also means that I'm not meant to be part of theirs any longer.
It’s actually compassionate both ways. They’re not part of my journey anymore… and I’m not part of theirs. You need that change. That person needs that change.
There's power in recognizing that you don’t exist to please everyone. You’re not on this earth to make everyone love you and support you. You don’t exist to make everyone happy.
There’s no greater reflection of your personal growth than disappointing someone else.
You're allowed to let someone down. You're allowed to disappoint.
As much as it might sting… you can be proud of yourself because that brief disappointment is a clear sign that you're changing.
Some people are not meant to be a permanent part of your journey… and you’re not meant to be a permanent part of theirs. It goes both ways.
You’re allowed to change. And you should. No one else knows what’s best for you. Only you do. Free yourself from the pressure to please everyone and let no one down. It’s the only true way to respect your trust and your potential.